How to make Phil’s (soon to be) World Famous Curry!

I’ve been asked again and again for my curry recipe. Apparently people seem to like it, which is awesome sauce! The problem comes when I stop providing the stuff for free.

So, I haven’t cooked curry in awhile, and people want to make it themselves. Cool beans! I like you guys, so here: have a recipe.

Phil’s Keema Matar Curry: The Curry that started it all
Serves 4, Takes 1 hour at most to prepare for an amateur.
0.5 kilos of Ground beef/Chicken/Turkey/ToFu/MacGuffin
1 Litre of Tomato Sauce
1/2 Onion
2-3 Cloves of Garlic
2 Cups of Peas
3-4 Sweet Thai Chilly peppers
Curry Powder
Ginger Powder
Basmati Rice

First things first, prepare. Get everything together, neatly arranged somewhere on a clean countertop. There are going to be some hectic moments at the start, so you need everything on hand.

When you have everything in front of you, go dice your half-onion. Remember to be careful with your blades, otherwise you might have problems! With your onions done, chop up your garlic. It doesn’t need to be perfect, just cut the living crap out of it until it’s finely chopped.

After that, you have to make your “paste”. Take two REALLY HEFTY tablespoons of curry powder, and put it in a bowl. Take another HEFTY tablespoon of Ginger, and mix it up with the curry powder. Once the powder mixture is roughly the same colour and consistency throughout, take little bits of water and add it in to the mix. Keep mixing small amounts of water into the bowl until the mixture has the consistency of a thick paste. Put it to the side.

Once you have your veggies chopped up and your paste pasted, it’s time to get started. Take a moderately sized pot, and put your butter in. You’re going to want enough butter to eventually cook your beef in too, so don’t skimp on it. With your butter melted, caramelize your onions.

With the onions caramelized, add your peppers and your garlic. Mix it around until the juices from the peppers have seeped into the buttery onion mixture.

At this point, take your ground beef and toss it into the pot. Immediately afterwards, do the same with your paste mixture. If the paste isn’t covering the beef properly, add more water until it can coat the beef more evenly. Once the beef is coated, turn the stove up: you’re cooking meat people! BE MANLY ABOUT IT.

Once the pink is gone from the ground beef, turn the stovetop down to medium low and add your tomato sauce, stirring the ground beef and the sauce together until it almost looks like a stew. Add salt to taste, and then put your peas in. It’s important to note that if you want to add any more veggies, this would be the perfect time to do so.

The mixture is more or less complete. Let is sit on the stove for about 30 minutes, occasionally checking to see if it starts bubbling too much or not. If it’s bubbling too much, turn it down a notch: try not to burn the stuff!

While the curry sauce is cooking, it’s time to prepare the rice. This is the easiest part. If you have a rice cooker, then you know what to do. If not, just take the amount of rice you want to eat, put it into a pot, and add twice that amount in water, then cook it on medium high until there’s no water left. When it’s cooked, just let it sit on super low until it’s ready to serve.


After the sauce has sat for awhile, it’s time to sart taste testing. This is the best part of cooking, and the part that makes me feel like a mad scientist.

It’s at this point that you take a spoon, and take a little taste of your concoction. How does it taste? Too spicy? Too sweet? Not enough spice? Want more bitterness?

You can add pretty much anything. Yogurt (Natural) dims spice, thickens the curry. Whipped cream thickens and sweetens the curry. Honey does the same. Ketchup adds sweetness and a bit of sourness, coffe adds bitterness.

At this point, it’s your playground. Add what you want! When you’re done playing chemist, let it stew for another 5 minutes, and then it’s done! Serve in bowls on top of rice.

You’re welcome.



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