A number of weeks ago, I wrote a post about magic.  On this post was a comment by a certain TJ, not the one from Temerity Jane.  In any case, TJ and I have a conversation there about his deck, and what TJ could do about it.  At the end of the conversation, I said I would eventually post about my decks on here in more detail.

Well, this one is for you TJ: Here is my big, most powerful deck, created and crafted over a period of several years to become the piece of shit it is.

Working Together For A Brighter Future Deck
WTFABF Deck for short.  Some have called it the What the %$#@, you ass-o-holic bastard %$#@ deck as well.  Drew, I’m looking at you.

History: I made this deck originally to play in tournaments, and it did reasonably well there.  As my deck evolved though, it wanted to do other things than Type 2 touneys, and so I let it.  As a result, I got 2nd place in a massive multiplayer free for all tournament, earning me $32 dollars store credit, a $20 card, and 2 large pretty art boxes.  Since then, it has changed very little, and still remains a powerful deck in most situations: it just does really well in a multiplayer environment.

Here’s the deck:

Lands: 23 Total
12 Forests
5 Plains
1 Eiganjo Castle (Why? Because I CAN.)
2 Elfhame Palace
3 Vhitu-Ghazi, the City Tree

Creatures: 16
4 Selesnya Guildmage
4 Sakura-Tribe Elder
3 Seedborn Muse
3 Scion of the Wild
2 Kamahl, Fist of Krosa

Spells and Aritfacts: 21
4 Devouring Light
4 Glare of Subdual
3 Sensei’s Divining Top
3 Mirari’s Wake
3 Priviledged Position
2 Eladamri’s Call
2 Hour of Reckoning

Total: 60

Now there are some changes I would like to make to this deck when I look at it already, but this is the deck as it stands.

The basic strategy of the deck is to make a lot of Saproling tokens, and then kill my opponent with them.  There is, however, more to it than that.  As this deck is pretty good at getting a lot of numbers on the table, it doesn’t get them out quickly like some others do: so how do I make up for that? By buffing them.

See, when you have loads of little people, a little buff goes a long way.  2 large creatures get the same benefit from a global enchantment that 12 smaller creatures do, and for the same mana cost.  The strength of this deck lies not in numbers solely, but in making those numbers count for more when I play one of my enchantments/buffs.

Mirari’s Wake, Kamahl, and Selesnya Guildmage all buff my saprolings to heights unseen by sentient fungi.  Kamahl is an obvious game winner: After using his ability, I just gave a dozen saprolings +3/+3 and trample, which nearly always ends a game.  Also, Mirari’s Wake gives a permanent +1/+1 boost to my attack and toughness stats for all of my creatures.  With Mirari’s wake in play I can make greater use of Selesnya Guildmage’s abilities to create a ton of saprolings and/or buff them to deal damage or survive a Pyroclasm or something.

But Phil, you ask, the Guildmage’s abilities are EXPENSIVE.  Even if you get a large amount of mana from Mirari’s Wake, how can you really make a big army of these guys?  Easily answered: Seedborn Muse.  With her ability (and it’s because of her that multiplayer is such a fantastic venue for this deck), I can create hordes of living plant-men at the end of my opponent’s turns, every turn.

Obviously, this makes her a target: and that’s where I have Priviledged Position to protect my synergistic community of mass murdering mushrooms.  Having 2 of them out at once will allow my creatures to be completely safe beneath an umbrella of awesome, just so long as no one uses global abilities.  Which happens often, but you can’t prepare for everything.

Now, one has to ask how I get all that shit to work when I want it.  Well, that’s not too hard either.  Granted, I don’t have any card drawing ability, but between having the cheapest, most effective creature getting card I know in game (Eladamri’s Call) and Sensei’s Divining top (went from being an Uncommon to being a Mythic Rare!), I can control how my game will go pretty consistently.

The other card that allows me to control how my game is gowing is Glare of Subdual.  With all the freaking fungus at my disposal, you’d think I’d have found a good use for it: and I have.  Apparently, they’re all so shiny that, with Glare of Subdual out, they can permanently lock an opponent’s creatures down.  Without any blockers, I can kill an opponent very quickly and with little effort, or allow a teamate to do so in my stead.

Now, I know things go wrong.  Someone out there might be playing elves, and has a huge amount of them ready to jump down my throat, or a Darksteel Colossus bent on breaking my bones.  Well, there’s a card for that too: Hour of Reckoning wipes the field of all non-token creatures, which means my saprolings live another day, and Devouring Light gets rid of those larger, peskier creatures.

If I needed to change something at this point, I would be tempted to try replacing the Devouring Lights with Path to Exile, and I would replace the Elfhame Palace’s with Sunpetal Groves, but those cost money I don’t need to spend right now; so the deck is going to stay as is.

If you liked this, I could make another post on how my other 3 decks work, but I’m not sure if anyone cares.




  1. Nice 🙂

    I’ve never been a fan of Green/White and creature creation always shits me off. I think if you came up against my Vampires, if I got a decent hand, I could take you down before you got all your saporlings and hopefully be able to kick your ass 50% of the time or so… Bad hands will screw me lol.

    I would like posts on your other decks… (I could get my Ink-Eyes B/R Ninja Burn deck out or my Mono White Vigilance deck if you wanted to hear about them 🙂 But if your a busy man, other posts are also entertaining.


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