In the spirit of the blog, I’ve decided it’s time for you all to know more about me every week. Just a little something, but something nonethteless.
This week, I’m talking about shower curtain rings. The really expensive ones.
They’re actually earrings? You could have fooled me.
See, whenever I see someone wearing these little hoops of dysentric stupidity, I can’t help but think badly of them. Why? Because I associate hoop earrings with bitchy, intolerable, snot nosed, stupid, ignorant, pissant, prissy, potty mouthed poodles who belong in nothing better than a Shaquille O’Neil movie as an extra.
Why is that? Who knows; but here’s my big beef:
Why the hell are you wearing something I could use as a shower curtain ring? I can’t tell if they’re earrings or something I bathe with. Seriously! More often than not there’s no difference outside of the fact that the earrings are typically silver, and that doesn’t count. Why? Because someone bought an $18000 umbrella stand, and that means someone can buy $500 shower curtain rings and pretend they’re jewelery.
Which brings me to my next point: why pay $500 for something I can buy at Home Hardware for like, I don’t know, $15? Same shit, less hassle.
Speaking of hassle, don’t those… things, get caught on stuff? I mean, I can’t count the number of times my earphone cable gets caught on my pants, door handles, errant nails, or anything just hanging around. These things are asking, begging to be ripped off of their fleshy perch. Look at them! If there is a God, he would be pulling them for fun.
So yeah, I don’t really care for these circular attention seekers, as the only attention they garner from me is a facepalm and a hope that someone or something rips them off.
What do you think about Hoop Earrings?